My journey to Unassisted Birth...

This is the journey that has no definite beginning. I'm not sure, precisely, at what moment I realized that I would choose to birth unassisted. I only know that several events led me to choose this and drew me to this option. It was shortly after my hospital vba2c. It was a wonderful, amazing, and empowering birth. I have always said that the only thing I would change was the location. My vba2c was my first experience in giving birth. It was also very close to being free from unnecessary interventions. I saw how smoothly and beautifully my body worked exactly how God created it to. Not a single intervention was needed to make this happen and I was not afraid to give birth. In fact, I looked forward to it. I attribute that to being why I felt almost no pain. Seeing my body work that way was probably what initiated this journey. It took finding confidence in birth as a physiologically normal event and trusting that my body would work exactly how it should.

I knew immediately after that birth that any of my future births would take place at home. I was a few months post-partum, not pregnant again nor expecting to be anytime soon, but I started interviewing midwives. They were all wonderful. In fact, the first midwife I ever encountered, happened to be one who's words alone gave me the courage to pursue my vba2c. She may not remember me, but I will never forget how she gave me strength to pursue one of the most amazing experiences of my life. And the words of another midwife (now I consider her a very good friend) were the words that gave me the strength to achieve my vba2c. So from there, my search for a midwife began in the cold winter. I am a planner and I would be prepared if I were to become pregnant again. After interviewing several midwives, some of whom I talked with for hours on end, I gained knowledge and a new resolve to advocate for natural birth. Everything they said resonated with me. I started to see birth in a whole new light. It became clear to me that birth IS a normal thing that rarely needs interference. Again, these women may never remember their conversations with me, but I will carry with me forever the wisdom they were able to share with me.

At some point, after interviewing the midwives, I started to actually imagine my own home birth. I remembered a dream I had where I was giving birth. It was shortly after my hospital vba2c that I had this dream. The dream picked up at the moment in real life where I had left for the hospital. Instead in the dream I stayed home. My baby was born smoothly, easily, and very peacefully in my bedroom. I was the only one there. The dream didn't scare me. At the time I had the dream I didn't think much of it. It was beautiful and I equated that to the joy I felt about just giving birth.

But I started to think about this dream. I had only heard once before of a woman giving birth alone but never thought about it more after that. Until I started to imagine my own home birth and my dream kept replaying in my head. It was exactly what I wanted--a peaceful, gentle, and calm, easy birth. So I started to look into homebirth more. I came across women who did give birth alone and I came across Laura Shanley's website. Everything I read was perfectly in line with what I felt innately about birth. I couldn't stop reading or learning. I read everything I could about unassisted birth and how to prepare for one. In one sense, I had seen my own birth go so perfectly and without a single complication, but I wanted to be fully prepared for any of the unexpected possibilites.

At every opportunity I educated myself and prepared myself for my next birth. It was over a year of intense study and learning before I found out I was expecting my 4th baby. The learning never ceased. Even now, in the 7th month of my pregnancy I have not stopped learning....and while I learn, I await the peaceful, beautiful, and smooth unassisted birth of my precious child.